Life in the Nuthouse

I posted this, because I felt that it deserved it’s own entry. Last weekend, my friend Meka participated in a state karioke competition, and…drumroll please…she won second place. This is very good news, because she gets to go to Albuquerque–my old stompint ground–on August 7th and 8th to participate in the regionals. So if anyone is interested in watching her awesome performances, they’re right here for your listening pleasure.

She and her friend are trying to raise funds so she can attend the regionals in august. If you are interested in assisting her, please email Cindy at
cindy.vw@msn.com

I don’t normally do this often, but someone posted this on LJ, so I thought I’d fill it out.

Three names I go by:
1. Jessica
2 samari
3 Jess

Three jobs:
1 Target stores,
2. Arbys
3. ABVI

Three places I’ve lived
1. Albuquerque
2. Las Vegas
3. Denver

THREE TV SHOWS THAT I WATCH
I don’t have cable, so I don’t watch much TV unless I’m at a friend’s house.

THREE PLACES I HAVE BEEN
1. Noxville, TN
2. Yorktown Heights NY,
3. Jersey city NJ

THREE PLACES I WANT TO GO
1. Ireland
2. France,
3. Scotland

THREE OF MY FAVORITE FOODS
1. Cheese
2. Ice cream
3. Pickles

THREE OF MY FAVORITE DRINKS
1. coke
2. Anything peach flavored
3. Rum and cokes

THREE THINGS I AM LOOKING FORWARD TO
1. Getting this massage test done and over with
2. Getting married and doing it right this time
3. James possibly coming to visit.

1. What was the last thing you put in your mouth?
raw spinach with blue cheese dressing

2. Where was your profile picture taken?
In front of the unitarian church about two years ago

3.Can you play Guitar Hero?
I can’t even play guitar. LOL!

4. Name someone who made you laugh today?
Everybody ripping on Marvin in a meeting

5. How late did you stay up last night and why?
I stayed up until about 1:30. We were roleplaying, and then James and I were talking on the phone.

6. If you could move somewhere else, would you?
Yes!!!

7. Ever been kissed under fireworks?
Nah, I was too busy taking pictures of them.

8. Which of your friends lives closest to you?
Heather, Candi, Renee, taren, and Emma

9. Do you believe exes can be friends?
It really depends on the people and how strong they are.

10. How do you feel about Dr.Pepper?
Yummy stuff!!!

11. When was the last time you cried really hard?
Last february. I was really drunk and I just lost it one night.

12. Who took your profile picture?
Bill.

13. Who was the last person of whom you took a picture?
The side profile of James.

14. Was yesterday better than today?
Both about the same.

15. Can you live a day without TV?
I’ve been doing it for two years.

17. Do you think relationships are ever really worth it?
Of course they are. The human race craves that interaction.

18. Are you a bad influence?
Oh please! Some would think I’m a goody goody two shoes.

19. Night out or night in?
Depends on how I feel

20. What items could you not go without during the day?
Purse, cel phone, Keys, MP3 player

21. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital?
It’s been so long I don’t even remember.

22. What does the last text message in your inbox say?
Emma found something she lost.

23. How do you feel about your life right now?
Excited about the prospect of being with James fulltime, but anxious about money and jobby stuff.

24. Do you hate anyone?
No. I’ve come close with a small few people, but dislike would be the word I’d use.

25. If we were to look in your facebook inbox, what would we find?
A couple of messages from people.

26. If you were given a drug test right now, would you pass?
Probably

27. Has anyone ever called you perfect before?
Maybe sarcasticly or joking.

28. What song is stuck in your head?
No earworms right now.

29. Someone knocks on your door at 2:00am, who do you want it to be?
I’d want it to be James, but if any of my other friends did it on the weekends I wouldn’t care.

30. Wanna have grand kids by the time you’re 50?
Not gonna happen at this point. LOL!

31. Name something you have to do tomorrow?
Go to work, Pay bills

32. What do you think of your significant other’s family?
Awesome! I admire the fact that they’re so close and they work together.

33. Do you think too much or too little?
Too much.

34. Do you smile a lot?
Not really.

35. Who do you miss?
James and my dog Kerry still

36. Have you ever been so tired that your eyes burned?
Oh yah!!!

37. Do you have an online game that you play often?
Not really. I stay away from them, because they’re so adictive.

38.Are you sitting in a spinny chair at the moment?
Yah.

39. Look to your left, what do you see?
A love seat

40.How’s the weather where you are?
Pretty hot

What is currently sore in your body at the moment?
My legs particularly my quads

Name one person you’ve never had a fight with?
DR Heather

What was the name of the last pet of yours that died?
Lamont

Any movies out that you’d like to go see?
Nah

What color is the couch closest to you?
Off white

What is an old TV show that’s not on anymore that you wish was?
everybody loves raymond

Are you looking forward to anything this week?
Not really. Don’t know who’s doing what this weekend.

Do you wear glasses?
No

Do you have another internet window open? If so, what site are you on?
My RSS reader

What’s the longest you’ve gone without talking to someone when you were mad?
I think Tasha and I went a couple of months without speaking.

How many lights are on in the room you’re in?
None. Too lazy to turn them on.

What’s the last thing you ate?
An egg salad sandwich and some raw spenach/tomato salad type thingy.

Do you wish you could sprout another arm to make life easier?
God no! That would be just one more appendage I’d have to worry about.

Do you know how to drive?
Tried it once.

Which are you better at, Math or English?
Probably math.

What’s your favorite channel on the TV?
I like the history channel. I’ve seen lots of interesting things on there.

How long does it take you to normally take a shower?
About fifteen minutes give or take.

Is your bedroom clean? If it’s not, when do you plan on cleaning it?
Nah, are you kidding? I’ll probably do some cleaning this weekend.

What kind of accent would you say you like the best?
Irish

Ever been on a picnic?
Yes.

What color is your cell phone?
Black.

What Color Is Your Tooth brush?
Clear

Name One Person That Made You Smile Today?
James

What Were You Doing At 8 Am This Morning?
Trying to wake up.

What Were You Doing 45 Minutes Ago?
Eating and reading RSS feeds.

What Is Your Favorite Candy?
Reeces peanutbutter cups, baby!!!

What’ s the last thing you said out loud?
Probably yelling at this machine.

What Is The Best Ice Cream Flavor?
Butter pecan

What Was The Last Thing You Had To Drink ?
Peach wedge

What Is The Longest You Have Gone Without Sleeping?
A couple of days

Have You Ever Made A Promise You’d Die To Keep?
No

Have You Bought Any New Clothing Items This Week?
No

The Last Sporting Event You Watched?
A hockey game with James about a year and a half ago.

What Is Your Favorite Flavor Of Popcorn?
Lots of butter, or lots of cheesey butter.

Who Is The Last Person You Sent A Message On Facebook?
Probably my friend Lisa. I was responding to a question she asked me.

Ever Go Camping?
Yep

Do You Take Vitamins Daily ?
I’ve been bad about that.

Do You Go To Church Every Sunday?
No

Do You Drink Your Soda With A Straw?
No

What Are You Doing Tomorrow?
Working and I don’t know what else.

Where Is Your Dad?
Deceased But always with me in spirit

What Color Is Your Watch?
Silver, I think

What Do You Think Of When You Hear Australia?
Rachel K., Alice D., Kerry H. Grace K. Shon G.,

What did you do yesterday?
Had to meet with someone, then worked.

Do You Go In At A Fast Food Place Or Just Hit The Drive Thru?
Depends on who I’m with or if I’m alone.

What Is Your Favorite Number?
3 I love numbers.

Who’s The Last Person You Talked To On The Phone?
Some customer at work.

Any plans today?
No. Going to get intimate with my bed.

Biggest Annoyance In Your Life Right Now?
People taking so long to get back with me.

Last Song Listened To?
I didn’t listen to any music today.

Can you say the alphabet backwards?
I have to think about it, but sure.

Do You Have A Maid Service Clean Your House ?
No. I should though, but not comfortable with it.

Favorite Pair Of Shoes You Wear All The Time?
This pare of sandles that really needs to be replaced.

Are You Jealous Of Anyone?
It’s no secret that I have jealousy issues. I just know how to keep them at bay, because they don’t solve anything.

Is Anyone Jealous Of You?
Don’t know.

Do you love anyone?
Yes. Lots of people.

What Do You Usually Do During The Day?
Work my arse off answering phones in a call center.

Do You Hate Anyone That You Know Right Now?
Nah. Dislike, maybe, but not hate.

Do You Use The Word ‘hello’ Daily ?
Yah when I can’t hear callers, or they hang up on me.

Do You Like Cats?
Long live the feline!!!

Have You Ever Been To Six Flags ?
Yes! Senior trip

How Did You Get Your Worst Scars ?
Got punched when I was ten. It’s still there after 23 years.

Last Cd Played?
A long long time ago.

Have You Ever Slept Until 1pm?
Oh yes, and later.

List Four People You Tell Pretty Much Anything
Candi, James, Julie, and DR Heather

List Three Favorite Colors/ shades.
Blue, red, purple

Laughed Until You Cried?
Oh yah.

Gay Marriage?
I see nothing wrong with it. I don’t see why people are so against it.

Lowering The Drinking Age?
They’re going to do it anyway whether it’s lowered or not so…

Who Are The Best Huggers That You Know?
James

Do You Believe In Love At First Sight ?
Depends on the people and the chemistry

Is There Something You Want To Tell Someone?
Yes a few things for a few people

Would You Kiss Anyone On Your Top Friends?
Maybe

How Many Kids Do You Want To Have?
At least one

Do You Want To Change Your Name?
Nah

Last Time You Saw Your Father?
I was eleven.

What Time Did You Wake Up Today ?
Someone called me at about quarter after eight.

How Old Are You?
33

What Were You Doing At Midnight Last Night ?
roleplaying

What Is Your Favorite Thing In Your Room?
My bed

Who Did You Last Hug?
Emma

Ha ha! Gotcha Sorry, not removing my clothes for you all. But it sure is a scortcher out there. I’m wondering if mother nature wants to have a BBQ of her own. The least she could have done was given us mercy in the form of either clean beaches, or friends with swimming pools. But know. apparently, that’s too much to ask of the evil merciless bitch.
Anyway, so I’m home. I guess you all know that, but hey. Had to start somewhere right? Saturday night was pretty stress free. I can’t spend one vacation at James’s place without either getting thrown or throwing myself into a hot bath with one or two beers next to me. Yah, you can all go ahead and laugh. I know guys mostly do that, but hey! Who said I had to be a total fem, right? Sonday’s travel went much smoother than I thought it would. We got to the bus station early, I got on the bus early, and we were off. I slept most of the way to Toronto, because, really, what else was I going to do with no wireless internet with which to exercise my pacmate, and only about four hours of sleep from the night before. I got to Toronto early, called James, to let him know, then was whisked off to the bus that would get me across the boarder. I was awake by this time, so I finished the latest Stephanie Plum book, (I’m kind of wondering if this is going to be the last one), and once that was done, began getting acquainted with Laurell K. Hamilton, via the Anita Blake series. So…we get to the boarder at about five after nine, and Ur’ur’ur’urch…low and behold…three charter busses. I think my heart rate and blood pressure went up. I was seeing visions of just missing my rochester bus. You know, the one that leaves at about 10:45 that night, and sitting in the Buffalo terminal killing not one, not two, not three, but four…count them…four hours by twittling my thumbs and trying not to fall asleep, or cry, knowing I wouldn’t see my apartment until about 4:30, and would have to be in work by ten. So I turned MS. Hamilton back on to keep calm, and to keep those visions which were dancing in my head at bay. Finally…at about twenty to ten…we moved. Everybody got off the buss, and we were all processed, and back on the bus by about twenty after. Buffalo, luckily, is only about five minutes from the boarder, so I made it. That glorious steel beast was still there and waiting for me when we arrived. So…I made it home at a semi reasonable hour–reasonable for me anyway–and guess what! My apartment was a bloody oven. I’d left the windows closed and the AC off, because…why leave it on when I’m not here to benefit from it. Obviously, my spirits didn’t need it so… After cooling this place down, I crashed.
It was back to the old saw mill on Monday. The crew was a bit sparce as one person had gone home to her family’s for the weekend, and the other was apparently asked not to come in. It wasn’t all that busy since it was the fifth, and everybody thought we were closed. They had a food day, which I didn’t know about, because…well…I wasn’t there last week. Candi brought ice cream, and as hot as it was, we were surprised that nobody touched it. I shouldn’t have to tell you that I just had to get some with some nice chocolate sauce and marachino cherries. That made my day.
Yesterday was crazy as was today. Both girls were back today. I had a small training for a new project we’re working on, and it was back to work as usual.
I’m hoping to do something this weekend. Emma texted me the other day asking if I wanted to get together, and I responded by telling her yes, because I had a lot to tell her. I haven’t heard back yet. I imagine she’s probably pretty busy. I’d heard a rumar floating around that Heather’s phone isn’t on, so I’m going to have to figure out a way of bothering her at some point, so we’ll see.
I don’t immagine much is going to happen tomorrow or Friday, but I’m sure i’ll be popping up in here if anything does. But in the mean time. I’m going to go see if I can find something to drink. No alcahol, folks. It’s Wednesday, and I’d rather not show up at work all hung over tomorrow.
OK, I”m out before I say anything else stupid.

As most of you know, I made my escape from Rochester for a week to take a trip across the border to spend James’s birthday with him. He’d been spending my birthdays with me, so I thought it only fair. I didn’t know what to give him, since he’s so easy to please and hard to buy fore, but his one request for his birthday was…little innocent me…Yah right. LOL! So I digress here. Little did I know, I was going to be the one recieving the surprise of my life. I had just gotten in, and we were relaxing on Saturday night when he all of a sudden went to a dresser drawer, grabbed something, came back, got down almost on one knee, and proposed to me, while putting the ring on my finger. We had been talking about it, but in the situation our lives are in at the moment, with my massage stuff, and his looking for work, and possibly going back to school, I figured it would be a while before it would actually be siriously talked about. But as of Saturday night5, James and I are officially engaged. Obviously, it’s going to be a while, as we have a lot of logictics to work out when dealing with two different countries, and both of us having family in all different places, so we don’t have a date yet. But we have made a step in the right direction, as this is something we both want, and are going to work toward. Naturally, I will be keeping you all abreast of any developments from here on out.
I have already informed most of the important members of my family. Mum took it better than I thought she would. She talked to him, and I think she realizes that I have picked a good one this time. Uncle Jim informed me that if he’s not told when and where, he’s going to be very upset. Mom thinks Grandma will be happy, but we’ll find out tomorrow. I also have to write my brother in prison to tell him. James’s family is all for it. His mother was the one who helped him pick out the ring. of course, his brother had to tease him, telling him not to do it, calling him a dumb ass and all that, but it was all in good fun.
I will be writing more about what’s been going on later, but I felt that something like this needded it’s own entry, because it’s important, and I really feel like I’m doing the right thing this time. I know it’s going to be a bit of a hard road, but I know that this is what I want, and I also know that it will all work out.;

I love how all you have to do is just punch in your first name, and it’ll just randomly generate something. This things just amuse me.
Actually, I’m beeing a bit sarcastic. I don’t normally do these things often, but since I can apreciate all things Irish and Gaelic, I figured I’d post it.

Your Gaelic Name is Morven Edana

Time is a good story teller

Today I went to the monthly taro meetup at the local psychic store here. I really enjoy these, because not only can you learn and gain insight on doing readings for others, but we can sometimes gain some insight into our own lives. We are able to do practice mini readings on each other, so a lot of us have questions that we can get some answers to. Today, we did some comparative taro reading where we got into groups of three, and compared the same card from different decks. Well, I asked a question that has been on my mind for about a week or so.
I’ll start with some background. I met Emma at the firewalk that we did back in March. A firewalk can be a very healing experience, because you have to walk on hot coals. It’s not as bad as you may think though. Anyone who knows about reflexology will know that the foot has pressure points that lead to all parts of the body. The toes represent the head and face, and the heal represents the lower half of the body. If you’re walking on hot coals, you’ll know where the most sensative points are on the foot, because you’ll feel them more than other parts. So this way, you can learn more about what’s going on inside the body.
OK, so I digress. I really didn’t want to go to this, because I just didn’t think I was ready. But Heather talked me into it, and so I went. I have to say that I’m glad I did. One thing Heather talked to me about, though, was the fact that the lady who was heading this thing asked at one point if I needed any help. Well, if you know me, you know that I have a hard time accepting long term help like that. I knew she already had a lot to do, and I figured I’d just ask whoever was next to me as I went, so I told her no. Plus, I have quite a bit of sight, and I figured I’d be ok. So I didn’t want to burden her with yet another task. Well, Heather said she took it to mean I was just closing myself off, and I just wanted everybody to leave me alone. Emma and I really connected, and I was looking foreword to a new friendship. Well, I went to a beltane celebration with her and a girlfriend of her’s and we ended up having a really good time. Everything started off ok. I knew she was busy, because she was going through nursing school, and working a fulltime job, so I figured we could hang out once in a while, but not very often, as she’s just very busy. Anyway, we were texting a few weeks ago, and talking about plans. She’s off on Saturdays, so I figured it would be perfect. I told her I was going grocery shopping in the morning, but I was free all afternoon. So then she texts back with an offer to take me to the grocery store. Now, I just wanted to get together, talk, have coffee, whatever. I didn’t want her to feel like she had to take care of me. I have had too many friends in the past who were only friends out of pitty, or because they had some unspoken obligation to take care of the poor blind girl, because…she can’t defend herself, do anything for herself, ect. So…I said no, because I wanted to get together to do fun stuff. When texting, it’s difficult to say what you want in only so many characters. Well, we got together, had coffee, came back here, did the taro comparison thing, and she went home. We hugged, said goodbye, everything was good, but since she moved, I haven’t heard from her. She moved into the city, so she’ll be closer, so I thought it would be perfect.
So I asked about it today. I dont’ remember what cards I ended up drawing accept for one, but two of them seemed to have something to do with balance. People draining people of energy, and not letting them. I told my group the story, and they basicly said what heather said about allowing people to help once in a while, because that’s what friendship is all about. Everybody knows that If I can do something for someone, I will. If Emma needed a massage, I’d do it. If she needed help cleaning her house, I’d do it. If she just needed someone to listen when she’s frustrated, I’d do it. So there’s nothing wrong with allowing someone once in a while to take me grocery shopping, or runn erands. I wouldn’t expect it all the time obviously, but they basicly said, “if she offers again, accept it.” So hopefully, I’ll get the chance again with her. I picked the 2 of cups, so maybe, hopefully. They suggested to give her a couple of days, and then try to call her, because maybe she just didn’t get the text I sent her.
I guess I really have a hard time with this, because I was raised to be totally self reliant, and not to burden others. I was also told as a child that I was just in the way, and eventually I’d be dead before ai was 21. So a lot of times, I feel that asking for help once in a while would just do nothing but make things harder for the person I’d be asking, and I dont’ want them to hold a grudge against me. So to avoid such awkward moments, most of the time, it’s just easier to figure out a way to do it myself. It’s difficult sometimes, but I’ve made it so far.
I would love to have more sighted friends, but I want to be equal with them, not be “taken care of” by them. I guess I just have a hard time finding that balance.

Hey there. Friendly neighbourhood webmaster here. Occasionally, I also double as a boyfriend. The blog’s going through a bit of a content overpopulation at the moment, mostly to do with introducing a whole bunch of posts from the days of LiveJournal to this otherwise far from established blog. Unfortunately, it means for the next few days things may bare a striking resemblence to a war zone. We’re working on fixing things, but in the meantime, if something should go break during your browsing of the site, point it out in a comment and/or email and it’ll get looked at ASAP. And now, back to semi-regular pontifications from the girl in charge.

These last few days have been pretty exhausting. Not bad, just busy. I actually worked six days this week, plus my double time for monday, which means nice big pay check for me. Cha-ching! And I’m going to need it, as I’m taking a trip up to James’s place for his birthday this year. I didn’t get to last year, because it fell in the middle of the week, and I couldn’t get the time off what with school and work together. So this will be my first time doing something for him for his birthday for a change. He’s been able to be with me for two of mine, so why not. Plus, I’ll get to see what Canada day is like. Unfortunately, I’ll be traveling back on the forth, but it shouldn’t be too bad until I cross the border.
I got an email from the lady at the department of education earlier this week, so everything’s a go there. And I found out that the commission’s going to reimburse me for my second go-around. So I’m going to study like a maniac for the next couple of months. Thank god I still have my thumb drive with all my notes. Plus, I still have that massage exam site I can go to. I have to do well on this one. I won’e expect 100 percent, but I need to get over 75 percent. Now, I just have to get Mike to tell me yay or nay as to whether or not I’m riding down with him again. Looks like I’m going to have to be proactive on that one.
Work is going well. I worked some overtime, and I’m fitting into the contract pretty quickly. I’ve always been able to learn things fast, but when it comes to dealing with people and doing it fast and efficiently, I get anxious. There’s still a few things I don’t know, but I’ve got Candi, Julie, and my supervisor to ask if I need anything.
So other than that, it’s been pretty low key around here. Heather’s gone away for a couple weeks, and I think Emma’s busy settling into her new place. So I haven’t really gone anywhere socially this weekend. Hopefully that’ll change in the next couple of weeks.
I also graduated from the training of the star treck roleplaying game. I’m learning that it’s been a while since I’ve watch any star treck, and probably need to do so again. I used to love voyager and DS9, and I have them all, as well as next gen, but I just haven’t sat down and watched them in a long time. So I need to think of a character, and figure out when I’m going to play and all that happy stuff. I’m really hoping this will help me reopen my creative side. I haven’t done any creative writing in a very long time, and since it’s one of my passions, I feel like I’m really denying myself that.
Well, I think I’ve written enough, so I’m going to pop back into my hole over here. I’ll pop out again soon.

These last few days have been busy for sure. It’s been good for me, and it makes the time go faster, but boy have things been eventful.
Monday I worked. Yes, folks, it’s the first memorial day I actually worked. Can you believe that. The best part is…I got double time. Cha ching! It was also dead as a bloody doornail, so Tasha and i ended up talking, and after she left I just read. I think I can count on one hand the calls I got. And for double time? Can’t beat that.
I also got a text from Heather asking if I could help her with her gardin and go to dinner with them. She picked me up at five when I got off work, and I was to discover that she decided not to do the gardening after all, as she was exhausted, and her hands were hurting from the drum making she’d been doing all weekend, so I didn’t get to play in the dirt. I was disappointed about this, because…you all know I love to get messy and dirty, and all that other stuff horticulturists like to do. So, we ended up just going to olive garden with Kenny, Heather, Renee and her fiance, a and this other friend of Renee’s. I stuffed myself, like a pig, as I always do. I even got Tirameesu. Then Kenny and heather needed to do some shopping. I guess Kenny needed a couple of things, and since Heather was going away for a couple of weeks for more drum making, she needed a few things, so we ended up at the Christmas Tree store, and Marshalls. Oh, and did I mention how difficult it apparently is to find jsut a simple strapless bra? Yah, not Walmart, or Marshalls. Anyway, so I digress. We ende dup looking around, they got what they needed, then I came home.
Yesterday, work was crazy busy. I think they were all making up for the holiday. I went straight to Candi and Kyles right after. I’d promised them I’d bring cup cakes from Sugar mountain, but they had to be closed on Monday. Bastards! LOL! So I didn’t get to do that. But Candi’s mom saved the day when she made both white and chocolate cup cakes, whcih we promptly dug into after supper. We were going to play uno, but Candi’s uno deck seemed to have done a disappearing act, and we both totally forgot how to play mellborn. Sucks too, because I used to love that game. We jsut had some nice time out on the balcony with Lessa the cat, and Kyle trying to dare me to pea off the balcony while these dudes were across the court yard. I’m not sure I’d have even done that drunk much less sober. LOL! I got my feline therapy, and we all got to talk outside of work, and it was just al all around good night.
I went straight to work from there this morning. Almost was late, because I rushed out this morning not knwoing that lift line was running half an hour late. Kyle fixed breakfast, and because I didn’t have a whole lot of time, I shuvvled it down and rushed out. I ended up sitting out there for 45 minutes. GRRR!
Tonight is just a low key day. I am assuming Heather did her planting, because I haven’t heard from her today, and she’s going away for two weeks for drum making, so no dirt for me. GRRR! Tomorrow night is my last night of training with the roleplaying group, then I have to come up with a character and figure out where I want to play. I don’t know what’s going on this weekend. I haven’t heard from Emma either, so I may text her and see what she’s up to. She just moved, so I imagine things are still a bit crazy in her world right now. So we’ll see.
I’m going to close this so James doesn’t think I’m ignoring him, and also, because I’ve babbled on enough. Oh, I forgot to mention, I finished the sixth book in the outlander series today finally. I’m starting the seventh book. Also trying to figure out what I’m going to read next.
Be back later.

So I was reading my RSS feeds, and found the following article.

http://paganwiccan.about.com/b/2010/05/18/pyramid-tomb-found-in-mexico.htm

I have always been drawn to pyramids and have always wanted to see them. I had no idea until recently that the mayas used them as well as the Egyptians. When I had that lexigram done a few years ago, that was one of the lives I lived. So to hear about this, really interests me. It says they believe this was even built before the Mayan civilization. That is very interesting to me, because I wonder what the people were before they were Mayans. Makes me wonder if Atlantis had pyramids too.

I’m trying to get back into this whole blogging thing. I stopped when things got so crazy with school and drama that I didn’t think anyone particularly cared to hear about, and I’m hoping all of that has calmed down.
These last few days have been pretty eventful. I don’t know if I mentioned it before, but I got a new position at work, so my schedule changed. I’m back to my 10-7 shift that I started with when I very first started at the call center. So I’m getting home much later than usual, and am able to sleep in a littel later than usual. So I’m not able to do as much in the evenings as I used to, because as soon as I get home, I eat, talk to James, and I’m pretty well wiped.
I signed up with the orgainzation James is in for the star treck roleplaying. I haven’t watched an episode of star treck in a very long time. I guess I should. I have them all, but I’ve always got too much to do. LOL! But I used to watch it all the time once I had winamp and all the episodes. So I’ve been training with that and getting to know the ropes.
I finally got together with Heather last week for breakfast and we were able to catch up. I hadn’t seen or heard from her in a couple of weeks, so apparently, a lot happened, as it’s totally not like her to go weeks without tweeting or contacting me.
I’ve been making other friends as well. I met Emma at the firewalk I attended back in April, and we connected well. We went to a beltane ceremony together, back at the beginning of may, and since it was my first real Beltane, I had no idea what I was doing. But it was very informal, and the people were awesome. The theme was based on friendship, and it was then that I realized I was still holding onto some sadness about another childhood friend from Idaho who I haven’t spoken to since sixth grade. But I digress. So, Emma and I got together here again a couple Fridays ago, and we had coffee and talked. She brought in both her taro decks and we started comparing decks. It was awesome.
Things with James are going good. I went up in March, as some of you know, and I’m not sure when I’ll be able to go up again at this point. I’d really like to get started on asking questions about what I need to do to eventually move up there, but he says all he can get are voice mails of people. I have absolutely no idea who I need to call, so I’m a bit clueless when it comes to that stuff.
My psycho neighbor moved out, so I won’t get my floor banged on at 2 in the afternoon. Cheech and Chong moved out, so I won’t get contact highs when I’m in the basement doing my laundry. My AC went out, but they brought a new one, so I’m mostly set for the summer. Now, if only they could put a swimming pool in here. LOL! I tease Kim and Julie, because Kim has talked about putting a pool in their back yard. I tell them, You’ll be seeing a lot of me then. LOL! I can’t help it. Water is theraputic for me.
Family situation hasn’t changed. Grandma moved to Washington DC. with my uncle, or should I say they’re in the process of moving. He got orders to go there, and he really wants her to stick with him for various reasons. Grandma wants me to come down and visit again. She’s hoping to get Mom and Spook to go around Christmas, and if I can get the time off, I might kidnap James and take him too. Mom’s still in Oklahoma. My brother inded up in prison. Uncle Jim was supposed to come visit me last week, and when he got to the truck stop, his boss told him I was too far, and he wasn’t going for it. That was a real let down. He’s my favorite uncle, and I haven’t seen him since 1998, so I was very disappointed.
Candi and I still hang when we can. I wanted to wait until things settled down in her world with school and things. I’m happy for her and Kyle because they’re pregnant. I know they’ve wanted that, and I’m glad it’s happened. Tasha and I have been civil. She’s back to who she was when we first became friends, but I still don’t trust her. But, we talk at work, and no drama, so I guess that’s ok. Julie and Kim are doing well. I still hang with them when our schedules permit. Chi left for a while, but then came back, so I don’t know when we’ll be hanging again. We went to a psych fair back in March, and we had a good time, but that’s the last time we’ve hung out. She ended up moving to Washington D.C. with some guy, and that didn’t work out, so she’s back now.
So, that’s about it in a nut shell. Last night, I went out with Bonnie, Nancy, and Jeff to a new place called Marks. Well, it’s new to me anyway. It’s a little diner type thing i guess. We ended up having a good time.
Well, I’m going to end this now, because it’s gotten too long. I’ve got more grocery shopping to do today, and I’ll be cleaning and things. Yay!

As I look at my twitter time lines everyday, I’m noticing that internet brodcasting seems to be THE hobby for more and more people. I’m either seeing people talking about it, or promoting their shows or someone else’s, and it got me thinking. When my best friend Desiree and I were in Junior high, we used to do things like that. Now, granted, we didn’t have internet, nore did we have a radio station in wich to work, but we did have duel cassette recorders, mocrophones, and music mixers. Well…she had the music mixer. Anyway, so we would go on tape and pretend we were doing radio shows. Sometimes we’d do them alone and trade them the next day, sometimes we’d meet at one or the other’s house and do them together. Umfortunately, I don’t have thes joint efforts anymore, or I’d show dimonstrations to those interested. It was always in the back of my mind as something that would be really cool to do, but then again, those tapes were for us. We didn’t ahve to worry about making total arses of ourselves for a bunch of people to hear. We could be as crazy as we wanted to be, becuase we knew that not even our parents would hear them. In some cases, this was a good thing.
So now, I see people actually doing this over the internet…for the reals. People either phone in, call in on skype, or IM in with requests or something whitty and funny to say on the shows. As much as I would love to be able to do something like this, now that we have awesome technology to do so, I’m kind of afraid to do it, because it would be just like all the other guys and gals out there doing radio shows on the net. I’m a creative person, but if I were to do something like that, what could I possibly do. There’s already shows with music in every genre, you have your chat shows, the funny and the serious, I just don’t know. Maybe since I work for an insurance hot line, I should do something where people call in about their health insurance? Let me think about that one for a second. NO!!! I’m not a sex doctor, so that’s out. I’m not, nor do I ever want to be like DR. Laura, so that’s totally out. I’m most definitely not doing taro readings over the net, because for one thing, I’m not experienced enough to be doing that for people, and for another, I don’t think that kind of thing should be done on a public channel for all to hear. So somebody give me more ideas, and maybe I can fuse them together, or…something. I thought of soem kind of karioke, or parity thing, but I just don’t know. Plus, I have no idea how I would even get set up on something like that. Do you have to install special software, or hardware? I have a microphone, windows media player, and winamp, I’ve got tons of music, and could get more if I needed it, I don’t have a program for karioke yet, but I imagine with a little looking, that could be obtained.
So these are just my thoughts about the matter. My mother thought I was weird when Desiree and I were kids, because we loved recording things and pretending. I just had no idea that I was doing something that a lot of other kids my age thought about, but are now able to bring into fruition.

I’m sitting on the greyhound bus on the way to Rochester, so it’s the last leg of my trip home from Canada, and I just want to say how happy I am that they’ve groken down and given us this wireless internet feature. I love being able to email/twitter/bug people while sitting on the bus next to someone I don’t know. It’s great for those long rides. Now, if we could just get them to fix their own website and schedule… We won’t discuss the freak of nature in Toronto who tried to get me to stay there an extra three or four hours because he thought he was trying to “help.” So I’ll just dwell on the positive; being able to write senselessly about nothing on my blog while traveling. If there had been wi-fi access when my best friend, Desiree and I were in JR. High, we’d have had a hay-day. Just sayin.

So I was thinking about this past year, and how hard it was going to be to give a recap of my life during this past year, because it was so much of a blur because of school. I didn’t have energy for much, due to the fact that not only was I pulling thirteen-hour days because of work and class, but I was also doing homework for various classes, plus a thirty-hour project for school. So I’m going to do the best I can with this, and hopefully, I won’t forget anything worth remembering.
January is always a dull month for everyone, because the holidays are over, people are either depressed because of all the bills they have to pay from all that Christmas shopping, or they’re all excited about all the new toys they got for Christmas. I was taking Swedish, myology and A&P. Plus, I was working a fulltime job, and juggling time with friends on top of that. I can’t think of anything memorable that happened that month. I do remember starting clinic that month. That’s where the public comes in, pays $35 for a full massage. You can bet your ass I was nervous as hell the first time. Luckily, it was a half day with only two clients, and they were both very happy with my massages. The first one was so happy he even left a donation in my name, and if I remember correctly, he got a gift card for his wife.
February was a bit more interesting. There was a night in which I got so drunk and crazy that the cops showed up at my door. Mostly, it was my psycho downstairs neighbor, who just couldn’t handle the fact that he had someone above him, who actually lived there and not at her boyfriend’s place, like the last occupant of my apartment did. I also completely cut all ties with Brad, by telling him off, saying things I wanted to say to him for a long time, and might I add, not in a very nice way either. James even helped things along, by getting in touch with him, and basicly telling him that he didn’t want to contact me again. Also that was about when Candi came back to work with us, and she, Tasha, and I had developed a bond.
March was a bit more eventful. Gina from Ohio came up to visit for a week. It was a rather interesting visit. Let’s just say that a combination of a major burn-out/nervous break-down, plus a studio apartment with two women and one dog, equals edgie to the third degree. Gina and I had a good time until the end when I just got edgie, and nervous, and probably didn’t handle things well, even after she left. We’re talking now, but it was a bit rough there for a while. I had my nervous break-down while Gina was there, and all I can say was thank god for her friend Ian who she hung with sometimes while she was at my house. They’d go out and I’d have some time to blow off steam alone if I needed to. I was beginning to feel trapped in my own skin, and just wanted to be free of it all. James had planned to come down to visit at the end of March, and had threatened that if I didn’t take a sick day from work, he wasn’t going to come down. Tasha threatened that if I didn’t stay home, she was going to kick my ass. So I did, and it helped, but not enough. I had several days during this past year when I felt like just giving up altogether.
April was interesting. James came down for two weeks, staying through until easter. I finished Swedish class that month and started taking treatments. I was excited about it until I started trying to memorize the different muscular conditions and how to treat them. It became a struggle, and I didn’t think I was going to pass it. There was a lot of other drama that got started, because I started realizing that a certain friend of mine was an attention seeker and an emotional vampire.
May grew even more interesting still. A friend of mine’s boyfriend–or shall I say on again off again boyfriend–started some rumars that James was in touch with a girl that he knew I didn’t like, and who he said he didn’t like himself, thus having me wonder if he was being dishonest with me. There were a lot of things surrounding it, which I won’t get into here, but we’ll just say that sed female in question found our blogs, read them, and decided, to kill time, to have a little bit of fun with it. My trust in James was tested, as well as my trust in my friends. It wasn’t too pretty, because I didn’t know who to believe. It didn’t help that for two months, sed friend kept predicting for months, that I would break up with James over something stupid, probably another girl. I went to visit him for Memorial day. I could only take a long weekend, due to school. I was glad I was with him though, because apparently, there was an emergency with his grandfather, and I know he had to be worried on some level, even though he didn’t want to admit it.
June was just another month of burn-out syndrome, friend drama, and thirteen-hour days. I also started helping Julie prepare for her wedding. She asked me to be the maid of honor, so I went through the preparations of shopping for my dress and things, and helping her to prepare emotionally and other wise for her wedding, which was to be in August. I also had to say goodbye to my grandmother on my dad’s side that month. She’d been sick for a long time; some strokes and heart atacks, so we were expecting it. I almost made a quicky trip to Idaho to see her one last time, but neither she nor the rest of the family thought it was a very good idea. We talked on the phone a few times before she died, but we could never talk for longer than ten minutes, because she was just too weak by then. It was hard, because she was my only link to my dad left. As time went on, though, I realized that I didn’t need that, as I already still have a link with him. That day I found out was also the day of my terrible horrible no good, very bad practical exam for treatments.
I went to visit James again at the beginning of July. Another long weekend, unfortunately, but at least we had some time, and I got away for a bit. We hung out with his cousin and her husband a lot, and I think we did get drunk one night, and got involved in a rather deep philosophical discussion about religion and our beliefs about where we came from and all. It really sucks, because I can’t have discussions like that sober. GRRR! I am hoping that’ll change, because I have a lot of spiritual thoughts and questions that I’d love to write about in here.
August was very eventful. James came down for another two weeks. Julie was married on the eighth of August. It was a beautiful wedding. I even got a bit teary-eyed. she and I have been friends for over twenty years, and I’ve seen her through a lot of bad shit, and have helped her out of a lot of jams. I was glad to finally see her happy with someone stable. I also finished treatments class that month. I’m happy to say that in spight of the struggles and bad practical exams, I passed it. I don’t feel too bad about the practicals, because both my instructors said themselfs, that in the real world, massage therapists have to look things up on the spot sometimes anyway.
September I finished A&P, started Shiatsu, and learned just what a small world this is. Back in January, I had a taro reading by a gentleman who worked for the local psychic store. He’d offten do taro readings during psychic fairs. He was doing a year long taro reading for me, and mentioned that around this time, he just kept seeing his friend, Heather in his mind. He couldn’t quite figure out why, other than the fact that she was active in a lot of organizations. Well, Sed Heather became our new pathology instructor. We got to talking one night, and she knew exactly who I was talking about. We have since become good friends. I learned that Shiatsu, which is a type of chinese medicine, comes to me so much easier than treatments did, and I absolutely loved it. My only complaint about that class was that it wasn’t nearly long enough, and I don’t feel like I got nearly enough hands on time.
October was another busy month. I didn’t get to go visit James for Canadian thanksgiving this year, because I still had tons of clinic hours to make up. So I esentially spent October and November working two jobs.
November brought some changes. We finished Shiatsu, and started energy class, another one that went right up my alley. I think it was then that I decided I wanted to go completely into energy and shiatsu work. Pathology was a struggle. I know Heather was disappointed in me, but I was having a hard time keeping everything straight. At work, we moved offices. Granted it was a new building just down the block from where we were, but it was an interesting move. I actually like the new building, and I love the fact that there’s a nice big bright window and I’m right near it. Now, if only they’d let me bring plants in. James came down a few days before thanksgiving, and I held him hostage until after my birthday. We did thanksgiving at my friend, Bonnie’s, which was good as always.
And december was crazy. I finally graduated on the 17th, and that was when Heather and I started to become friends. We went out to dinosaur BBQ, which is one of my favorite places, for my birthday. I guess December was a month of tying up loose ends, and letting things go. Unfortunately, I had to tell Tasha we couldn’t be friends anymore. I was sad, but I felt that she was draining and depending on me, and I just didn’t have anything else to give her. Plus, she couldn’t handle iit if I told her she needed to learn to do things for herself, and proceeded to go to everyone else and cry to them that I was mean and hurt her. All I can say for her now, is that I hope she learns to be more self reliant, emotionally and otherwise, and I wish her the best.
And that, my friends, is my 2009 in a nut shell. For anyone who asks, no, I am not making any resolutions. I hate them, and I refuse to make resolutions that won’t be kept. But I will tell you frankly and honestly. I’m scared to death of what this year holds. I’m done with school. I take the bords on the 28th of January, and after that, I have no earthly idea where my life is going. I’d like to say I’d be in Canada permanently before the year is out, but I also know that doing that is going to require a lot of planning, a lot of money, and a lot of time. I’m not even sure how hard it’s going to be for me to get in. Plus, when I do, how long it’ll take before I can practice in Ontario. So all I can say right now is that I’m going to take the New York State bords, then save up for the nationals, and if I pass the NY bords, I’m going to find some work doing massages for a while until I can figure all this shit out. Heather wants to do another Taro reading soon, and I’m hoping that will shed some light on this.
So here’s to another year, an for those who are into numerology, here’s to the first year of a new numerological cycle. I’m diving in and I’ll let you know what I find at the bottom.

OK, so I’m going to try not to make this a ranty post, but i have been thinking about this for a long time, but haven’t been brave enough to ask questions. It seems that each time I come to Canada, Customs seems to delve more and more into my personal life. The very first time I came up here was last summer. They didn’t make me get off the bus, they just asked the usuall preliminary questions, and were off. No big deal. But it seems that lately, they’ve been leary of me for some reason. When we reach the border, I usually prefer to go in and talk with them just like everybody else, but for some reason the last few greyhound drivers don’t seem to to think me capable of doing this challenging task. So they come on the bus to talk to me. Back in July, a gentleman came on, asked the prelimonary questions, then began asking how I support myself. I informed him that I both worked and went to school. Then, he wanted to know where I worked. I told hem, of course, as I have nothing to hide. Then he asks where I live, and if it’s an apartment or a house.
This last time, the woman was even more leary of me. Again, I was asked to stay on the bus. She came on, asked why I was going to Canada. I said to visit my boyfriend. She asked all the usual questions again, then asked if I was planning to get here and then decide to live here. I said no of course, as I don’t make random decisions like that, and I have a job back home. Then, she says: “are you sure?” I said “yes.” then she asks again, “are you sure?” Again, I said “yes.”
It’s things like this that make me wonder if when I do make the careful decision to move here, just how hard it’s going to be. I have to wonder what customs thinks when they see blind person with white cane, do they think automaticly moocher, or is it just because I’m coming to visit my boyfriend? I am well aware that it’s going to be a while before I can come up with the money for the paperwork, and after that, it’s going to be a while before I can get licensed as a massage therapist up here, so I’m wondering if they see me and see another disability case they have to take care of. Also, what is it that makes them so suspicious of me? I know I’ve made some pretty quick decisions in my time, but moving to another country, even though it’s still on our continent, is not a decision to be taken lightly, and if only they knew how I felt about people coming to our country illegally, they would understand that I would never do something like that. Is it wrong to fall in love with someone from another country, and want to be with them? Is it going to be that hard to get in, because OMG, I can only see out of one eye, and, OMG might need time to find work so can still contribute to society there? Do people really have that little faith in us , and do they really think that just because, OMG my one eye doesn’t work at all, and OMG, the other one’s not exactly perfect, that there’s something wrong with that thing between my ears that I can’t contribute to society? It seemed to this latest customs officer that we were no more than kids needing to feed off our respected governments, and were just having fun. OK, maybe we are having fun, but hey! we’re adults too. We are perfectly capable of living and working on our own. We have our own thoughts, dreams, hopes, goals, bla bla bla bla bla bla. I just wish that people, not only customs officers of both countries, would wake up and smell the bloody roses. Try to learn something about us, instead of believing what people from the 1950′s told them.
OK, semi rant over.

Ouch
Let me just say this. I will *never* bitch about Brad breaking up with me via email again. Damn!
More to come soon. Got a lot to write.

So we have these two male coworkers. One who has been there longer than I have, and who’s biggest ambition is to shag every good girl he comes across when he can. We’ll call him K. The other one is fairly new; started back in August. He’s very ridgid and a little two authoritative. We’ll call him J. Now, K. and J. both have major crushes on a female supervisor. K. tries to deny it, but some of us know. J. has been very open about it from the start, and has even gone so far as to actually ask this woman out on a date. I don’t need to tell you that he got turned down. Everytime she comes in the room, he’ll jump out of his chair just to talk to her. When I used to bring up my dog, who has the same name as her, he piped right up and wanted to know more. I had to simmer him down by telling him I was talking about my guide dog.
So every April, at work, we have a big United Way thing where a committee gets together and comes up with creative ways to raise money for the United Way. Every year we have what they like to call an Angel auction. This is where employees donate either things or tallents to auction off and raise money for this United Way project. Well, sed female supervisor, every year, likes to make her famous chocolate covered strawberries. Everybody goes crazy over these things, and they go at a high price every year.
Ok, so J. and K. were talking the other day, and K. asks J. if he plans to participate in the auction this year. J. says he really doeson’t want to. So K., just to fuck with J. informs him that female supervisor Makes her famous chocolate covered strawberries, and has entered them into the auction. J. begins to get all excited. So for extra affect, K. tells J. that she has also been the one to make the pillos that were donated for sed auction. J. gets this whistful look in his eyes, and whispers “Oh, to have pillos made by someone from the agency.” Ok, so if that’s not enough, after J. bids on both, K. decides to go and make a high bid on the silent auction. I think it was $90 for the strawberries and $45 for the pillos. J. goes and bids $100 on the strawberries. We were to discover that she didn’t make the pillos and kind of accidently ruined that one. Imagine being atatcked by K. for that one.
Ok, so fast foreword to yesterday. J. is able to go to the live auction. K. is not. Nobody else has bid on the pillos and as of yesterday before the live oction, the bid was $100, the highest bid anyone’s ever heard of. The conversation in the cafeteria is booming because of rumars of the $100 bid. So he comes back to the call center, and we’re to discover that in bidding with others, it went up to $200 and he has won the strawberries. K. won the pillos; poetic justice for fucking with J. and lying to him about who made them. Later, female supervisor comes around to collect the money, and K. tells her, “tell them not to bother making the pillos. What am I going to do with them, give them to some bimbo I know?” Female supervisor laughs and teases him unmercifully for what he’s done. Then, I laugh, for the rest of the afternoon.
Now, I’ve had crushes, and maybe I’ve been known to be a bit over obsessed, so to speak, but I would never shell out that damned much money for any food that they might make. I know it’s for a good cause and all, but I also know why he did it, and I’m sorry, but I’m just a wee bit amused by it.